The Problem with “Everybody Struggles” statement

“Everybody struggles in this world.”

I know you have read it or heard it many times so I am not saying anything new. It’s the reality of this world and no one has ever achieved anything without facing the setbacks. The nature and duration of struggles might differ but at the end of the day ‘struggles’ is the only constant in the lives of each and every human being. But this blog is not about repeating this ultimate truth about human life. It’s about the problem with the very statement “Everybody struggles”.

Do you know someone who is at a point in their life where they have no idea what is going on? It could be you as well. What do you tell them when they share their insecurities, doubts and confusions with you? Are you ‘really’ present in the moment and listen to what they are saying? Do you try to be understanding, kind and compassionate? or do you simply dismiss or cut short the conversations by saying “Everybody struggles in this world”?

You do not understand it but such statements are totally unhelpful. The person who is making the efforts to confide in you does not expect such feedbacks, trust me. They don’t want you to ‘generalise’ the conversation. Rather they want the whole conversation to be about them. Kind of like an ‘individualised treatment’ in medical science. People don’t want you to solve their problems for them. They do not want you to face their life’s struggles either. They just want you listen to them actively with full maturity and zero judgements. I have met so many people in my life and I can only think of a couple of people who are worthy enough to share my problems with. The best part of it is that I get so much inspiration from this that I try to do the same thing for others.

The conversations in our lives have become very casual- we listen from one ear and filter out ‘most’ of the incoming information from the other. Sadly, we do this even with our loved ones. What really happens then? We end up saying “Everybody struggles” as if that would do the magic.

Different Stories Walking Around

Picture Credits: The New York Times

So I was sitting on a bench. Weather was a bit gloomy. It was cold. Not too cold to shiver or anything. Surrounding was clean- actually very clean. I was breathing fresh air. Everything around me felt fresh and pure. Buildings were distant but I was simply appreciating their beauty. Then I turned my attention to ‘people’ walking around. Or should I say ‘different stories’ walking around.

Observation can be quite interesting. My simple observation made me think I wasn’t only looking at people rather I was looking at “unique stories”. Every person who was walking by me or was walking a little faraway from me is a story. Different backgrounds, different languages, different opinions, different educational degrees, different experiences facilitated the birth of different stories. You don’t know what is going on in their minds. You don’t know what they are thinking in that exact moment. For you they are simply people. But when you think about it they are all stories. Stories we are completely unaware of yet leave no opportunity in passing judgements.

Everyone is trying to make a dent in this huge complex world. Everyone wants to feel like they belong in this world which makes sense because no one should have to feel otherwise. Be kind to each other. Be humble. Be simply a good human being. You just might help re-write someone’s story for good.

Not Every Doctor is a Money Making Machine

Picture credits: The Hindu Business Line

I do not know what generalisations prevail in other countries regarding medical doctors’ income but I can surely speak for my country. In India, it is a common held belief that ‘doctors are a big time money making machines’ They charge hefty fee and are very rich people. There is a certain amount of truth to that. Why? Because in every country there are certain professions that allow one to earn pretty decent amount of money. People belonging to certain professions never seem to go out of business. Medicine is one such profession. That’s how things are. And we cannot change them.

Ever since I have grown up enough to make sense of the world I have come to realise that every medical doctor in India is labelled as a “money making machine”. Consultation fee are all time high. Unnecessary tests are advised. Commissions are set. Big houses at different places. Multiple bank accounts in different banks. And the list goes on….It is true that medical doctors are ‘becoming’ businessmen. To them patients are not a priority. They don’t care much if their patient is going to get well after seeking the treatment. Such doctors do no justice to their profession. They act against their oath. And it is pretty sad.

However, generalisation is bad especially in this case. Generalisation is one of the cognitive distortions humans are pre-wired with. So it is natural to say that ‘every medical doctor is like a robber: snatching away people’s hard earned money’. We look at someone and then go on generalising. I think it’s time we take a moment and debunk this generalisation. Why? Because there are so many doctors out there not just in India but all over the world who care a great deal about their patients. They have a duty to cure people and they do it full honesty. Money is important to them as no life can sustain without money. They want their spouses, children, parents, relatives and friends to have a good life. But never at the cost of going against their oath. It is okay for such doctors to have no social life but totally unacceptable to see their patients suffer at 11 PM. They don’t want their patients to suffer because of the money and so they charge what even the poorest can afford. It is okay for them to not upgrade an old car. A car or other material stuff stands nowhere near the satisfaction a doctor gets after seeing his/her patients get all well. Imagine how bad it feels to these saint doctors when they are also labelled as ‘scavengers’. They spend their whole lives living to a bare minimum and yet they are perceived as the richest people on the planet.

People feel absolutely no guilt spending 2000 rupees in fancy restaurants eating foods that are killing their bodies or even getting a Netflix and Spotify subscription. But come about complaining when a doctor charges 500 rupees as a consultation fee. What is wrong with asking what one deserves? Doctors spend so many good years of their lives studying so they are skilled enough to cure people. Why can’t people just see all the hard work they have put in for years and years? But all eyes are on “CONSULTATION FEE: Rs 500”. I am not saying you should cancel your Netflix subscription or stop eating food in restaurants. It is your money and you can do whatever will make you happy. But attacking doctors all the time on the grounds of fee and other things does not reflect one’s goodness.

The world has changed a lot. Money is taking over people’s love for each other. People are forgetting about their duties and responsibilities. In the midst of all this darkness, there are many people who are keeping the light on. And that light is a sign that humanity is still alive.

“Read More. Read More.” Stop making a big deal out of Reading.

Picture credits: WeAreTeachers


I am pretty sure as soon as you open YouTube or any other platform filled with information, you come across headlines such as:

“Read More.”

“Why you should read more?”

“What I learned after reading 1 book a week.”

“Why reading more and more will make you successful?”

I cannot tell you how irritating I find such headlines. I am not against reading. To be honest I, myself is an avid reader. I love books. Literally, I just love books. Other than a paper and pen if there is something in this world (material) I cannot live without its none other than a book. I read every day. I have been reading everyday for the past one year (I believe I have missed approximately 20-25 days out of 365 days). Reading has become a part of my daily schedule. Just the way I don’t live my days without water I don’t let my days pass by without reading. It doesn’t matter how much time I give to reading as long as I am reading. Some days I read for an hour. Some days I read for 15 minutes.

Reading is very personal to me. I don’t read to impress others. I don’t even post anything on social media. I read because I love knowing about different things. I read because I am a very curious person. I read because it opens up my mind about variety of stuff. To put more simply, I read because I want to attain knowledge which I can then apply to attain wisdom.

It makes me sad how people are making a big deal out of reading books. They are putting blogs and videos on reading more and more or reading 1 book a week. I respect that they are promoting reading because it’s a habit worth cultivating. But now it seems like reading has become so over-hyped. We should read books for ourselves and not others. It is completely okay if you are unable to read a book in 7 days. It is also okay if you complete a book in 2 months as long as you’re finding it interesting enough to keep going. I don’t know how reading makes one successful because success is a very subjective concept. Success has a different definition for everyone. For some, a successful life comprises of good health- both physical & mental, a loving family and friends. For others success might mean driving luxurious cars and having multiple properties at different locations.

Reading books has become very convenient, cheaper and easily accessible. Unlike older times, we have multiple ways to gather information from books. Some people find audiobooks the best. While others prefer having a book in a physical format. It is a good thing that so many people are prioritising books in their lives. Because without a seed of doubt reading makes us better. However, it should be for genuine reasons. Do not read so that you can post about it on social media. Do not read just because everyone is reading. You should read so that you become a better version of yourself each day.